Moved away

Moved away

Kenny Dalglish (Liverpool manager) is looking for some new talent to play up front in the squad.  He calls all of his talent scouts together and tells them “I don’t care how far you have to go, but I want the best striker you can find.  Someone who can put the ball in the net from anywhere on the field”

A few weeks go by and he gets a call from one of the scouts, “I’ve found what your looking for” the scout says “just one problem though….He is in Iraq”.   Kenny says “No worries, we will sort it out!”

A couple of weeks later the Iraqi Striker is sitting on the subs bench waiting for his chance.  Liverpool are playing Manchester United and are 3 nil down when their striker get injured and stretchered off.  Kenny send the iraqi boy onto the pitch saying “Now’s your chance son, show me what you got…”

Couple of minutes later, BAM, Beautiful goal.  Then another.  A nice header into the top right corner, now 3-3.  Finally a Penalty kick making it 4-3 to Liverpool.

Next day the newspapers have a field day, the iraqi kid is plastered all over the sports pages.  Total celebrity status.

The kid being really proud of himself decides call home and tell his mum, “Mum, Mum, I scored four goals in my first match, I’m all over the news papers, they are treating me like a hero!”

The mum says “thats great son, let me now tell you about my day….  You’re father got shot in the street today.  One of your sisters is now working as a prostitute for a local gangster.  Your brother joined a gang and got arrested and beaten up by the police and your other sister got gang raped in an alleyway!”

“Mum, thats terrible, Im really sorry!”

“Sorry?…..Sorry?…..Its your bloody fault we moved to Liverpool in the first place!”

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