Posted by imake on May 19, 2017 in Funny jokes, Random jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on Pants are relative
Yesterday my next door neighbor accused me of stealing washing off her line – said she was gonna call the cops…
I was so worried I nearly shit her pants!
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Posted by imake on May 18, 2017 in Funny jokes, Random jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on The tuna sandwich
A funny new trend at the office:
People putting names on food in the company fridge.
Today I had a tuna sandwich named Bob.
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Posted by imake on May 15, 2017 in Funny jokes, Random jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on Priceless
New Miley Cyrus DVD: $15
Tub of Vaseline: $3
XL Box of Tissues: $2
The look of disgust on the cashier’s face as you pay: Priceless 
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Posted by imake on May 15, 2017 in Animal jokes, Funny jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on What the hell was that all about?
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says “What the hell was that all about?”
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Posted by imake on May 10, 2017 in Funny jokes, Short jokes, Sports jokes | Comments Off on They fast
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
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Posted by imake on May 10, 2017 in Funny jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on Graveyard
Why are there fences around a graveyard?
Because people are dying to get in.
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Posted by imake on May 9, 2017 in Doctor jokes, Funny jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on 10
Doctor: “I’m sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live.”
Patient: “What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!”
Doctor: “Nine, eight, seven …”
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Posted by imake on May 9, 2017 in Funny jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on Wishing well
My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.
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Posted by imake on May 5, 2017 in Funny jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on Outlaws
What is the difference between In-laws and Outlaws?
Outlaws are wanted.
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Posted by imake on May 5, 2017 in Funny jokes, Short jokes | Comments Off on Questions
What’s the difference between a tribe of pygmies and a girl’s track team?
The tribe of pygmies is a bunch of cunning runts.
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